I really like the sound of your voice.

My blue shirt.

This is my new blue shirt. It might be the softest shirt I have ever worn. I would like nothing more than to hug you wearing my new blue shirt. I would like nothing more than to kiss you wearing my new blue shirt. (My apologies for the dirty mirror)

We didn't go to Idaville today because of the snow. I figure one snow accident is enough for the week.

I forgot that Stuart Murdoch taught me how to sing. Belle and Sebastian will always be the music of my life.

The Life Pursuit

Before I crashed my car I was listening and singing along to "Another Sunny Day" by Belle and Sebastian. I listened to it this morning. I've never heard a better song.

I found out I'm worth 20,000 more dollars today. What good is money to me right now? I'd rather spend it all on flowers for you. Or a Camera for you . Or maybe just save it so we have nothing to worry about when we travel.

Never for money. Always for love.

Just take me back to the days where the only thing that mattered was Love. There will be more sunny days and more rainy days that we can share.

Another sunny day, I met you up in the garden

You were digging plants, I dug you, beg your pardon
I took a photograph of you in the herbaceous border
It broke the heart of men and flowers and girls and trees

Another rainy day, we're trapped inside with a train set
Chocolate on the boil, steamy windows when we met
You've got the attic window looking out on the cathedral
And on a Sunday evening bells ring out in the dusk

Another day in June, we'll pick eleven for football
We're playing for our lives the referee gives us fuck all
I saw you in the corner of my eye on the sidelines
Your dark mascara bids me to historical deeds

Now everybody's gone you picked me up for a long drive
We take the tourist route the nights are light until midnight
We took the evening ferry over to the peninsula
We found the avenue of trees went up to the hill
That crazy avenue of trees, I'm living there still

There's something in my eye a little midge so beguiling
Sacrificed his life to bring us both eye to eye
I heard the Eskimos remove obstructions with tongues, dear
You missed my eye, I wonder why, I didn't complain
You missed my eye, I wonder why, please do it again

The lovin is a mess what happened to all of the feeling?
I thought it was for real; babies, rings and fools kneeling
And words of pledging trust and lifetimes stretching forever
So what went wrong? It was a lie, it crumbled apart
Ghost figures of past, present, future haunting the heart

Today's your day.

Happy Birthday Dad.

I have so much wrong going on with me right now. I wish I could talk to you about it. I love you.

I wanted you to go with me to Idaville today Laura. I know it wouldn't of been your ideal afternoon but I just wanted you to stand with me.

It's still there. Don't worry.

I miss you too sweetbeb.


I want to take you on an adventure.

Comets

I bought a Bill Haley and his Comets record today. It makes me want to move all the tables and chairs out of this living room and dance with you til both our feet are sore.

I love you Yoko Ono

In the middle of the night
In the middle of the night I call your name
Oh Yoko, oh Yoko, my love will turn you on

In the middle of the bath
In the middle of the bath I call your name
Oh Yoko, oh Yoko, my love will turn you on
My love will turn you on

In the middle of a shave
In the middle of a shave I call your name
Oh Yoko, oh Yoko, my love will turn you on

In the middle of a dream
In the middle of a dream I call your name
Oh Yoko, oh Yoko, my love will turn you on
My love will turn you on

In the middle of a cloud
In the middle of a cloud I call your name
Oh Yoko, oh Yoko, my love will turn you on
Oh Yoko, oh Yoko, oh Yoko, oh Yoko

Crash

Crashing my car is the last of my concerns. I thought of you and how I was going to get to you while I was crashing.

The picture of you on your blog made me cry. That was the last day for us.

Who am I anymore?

I woke up this morning and I realized I have not been myself since Dad died. I slipped into this daze of doing drugs and always playing the victim. What happened to the old me? Why am I not the kid that would stay up all night just writing stupid little songs? Why do I not sing Belle and Sebastian songs in my kitchen at 2 AM anymore? I don't need all these drugs anymore. I don't need it to cope. I will always love you Dad. It's now starting to feel okay that you aren't with me anymore. I don't need the drugs to cope. I've coped.

I'm not going to be this way anymore. I don't want to be high all the time. I don't want my life to revolve around my couch. I've lost contact with many friend this semester and I lost the girl I loved. I need to be myself again.

This starts today.

Colours

Yellow is the colour of my true love's hair,
In the morning, when we rise,
In the morning, when we rise.
That's the time, that's the time,
I love the best.

My bed is empty

My bed is a place that we used to rest. I think I'll crash on the couch tonight. :(

I really don't know how to deal with this. I used to talk to you when I was this sad. I don't think anyone else can really help me.

I would do anything right now just to have you here.

Day 1

I feel horrible. I can't control my shakes.

I want to talk to you so badly. I'm doing my best to not. I really want you to call me and make this all ok.

I want this to all be resolved. I want you back.

Our love was always special and unique to only us. It can't be duplicated. I don't want it to be duplicated.

Don't just let this go.

I'm wondering how you are feeling. I want to cheer you up if you are sad.

I went to the duckpond today to cry. I wept in the cold. Thanks for the gloves though.

Please call me. Please make this all better again. I love you and I don't feel right without you.

What I'm thinking about

Sunny Afternoons

Hands

Kisses

Lazing around

Having the time of my life doing absolutely nothing

Hearing you sleep

Cold Noses

Being weird

Beb

Only understanding what each other mean

Having a Best Friend

Knowing what it means to be truly happy

"Landed" - Ben Folds

Holding Hands in the park

"Ease your Feet in the Sea" - Belle and Sebastian

The Beginning of Summer

Jane

I really do like your art. You think I'm just saying that but I really do like it.

My Room at 225 N Thorne Street

Cedar Point

Grandaddy's Sumday Album

Calling you every Sunday

Your cool tricks

Blankets in the quad

Sneaking kisses when no one looks

Watching movies on my laptop

The backgrounds you put on my computer (The one of you pointing at me just came on the screen :( )

Your photography

The powerpoint you made me (I found this the other day. Right after I did I texted you that I loved you)

Weeping Willow trees

Behind Walmart

Sweetkeeses

Our own language

Spinal Tap

The day you told me you loved me for the first time

You made me smile somehow the day dad died. You were there within 10 minutes of me calling you.

Mint Chocolate Chip

Going on walks

"Kent Shearer Cannot Sing" - Kent Shearer

Staying up all night making you a case for a CD I burned you

Johnny Cash's "Walk the Line" on Ukelele

plzwarmhandsplz

My name is written on your bedroom wall

Looking at the art at the Honeywell center

"I love you beb"

I hope you come back.

I love you so much : (

The Earth

The world is not beautiful to me unless I have someone I love to see it with me.

Laura, I love you.

Positive Vibrations

All positive vibrations ended this morning. Good days just lead to bad days.

Wabash, Indiana

I realized what was missing from Wabash today. I won't be going there unless the conditions are right (ie Breaks.)

All I need is in Muncie. Very Thankful.

High Speed Adorable Girlfriend.

Noah

Oh when the wild was all covered by snow,
I forgot the colours that the grass tend to grow.
Oh the trees were all leafless,
And lifeless and black,
And I wondered if the leaves could grow back

For your heart is like a flower as it grows,
And its the rain, not just the sun that helps it bloom,
And you don't know how it feels to be alive,
Until you know how it feels to die

This is what I look like today.

Friendship.

I'm going to have to cancel this friendship. Sorry, It's not my responsibility for us to be friends. I have better friends anyway.

- Kent Shearer.

Sunshine, we all see the same sky. Looking, learning, asking the same "why?"

Don't Bother.